


Choosing to Fall

by FemaleJaeger



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, CPR, Fluff and Angst, Gender-neutral pronouns for Pidge, Injury, Langst, M/M, Near Death Experiences, POV Alternating, shance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2020-05-18 19:45:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19341349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FemaleJaeger/pseuds/FemaleJaeger
Summary: Nothing like the adrenaline of a near-death experience to realize some feelings.





	1. Crash Down

“ _It’s so hot,_   _ow_ ,” Shiro thought. The heat was enveloping him from all sides, heat on his back, heat in his aching joints, and heat in his lungs, just so hot. He took a breath but with it, dust entered his mouth and throat. It burned as the dirt particles coated his esophagus. Shiro coughed, trying to get a clean gulp of air. Shiro brought a hand to his helmet to close the faceguard, filter more oxygen, and to prevent himself from eating another mouthful of dirt. With a groan, Shiro rolled to his back, a new heat seared at his side with every breath, “ _A bruised rib?_ ” He wondered. Then the moments leading up to now came rushing back to memory.

Voltron had been shot out of the sky.

Shiro sat up quickly and then doubled over in pain. He gasped as the pain intensified instantly. “ _Maybe it’s broken,_ ” Shiro finally caught his breath and tried to keep his breathing shallow. A scan of the area showed the lions scattered like rolling hills. They were each half covered in debris from the crash landing. The closest lions were Black and Blue in a heap on top of each other. “Keith, Allura,” Shiro rasped as he fought his own body to stand up and walk towards the lions. He opened his face mask to spit out the dirt he had inhaled.

After pushing a button on his wrist, Shiro asked into the microphone found there, “Can anyone hear me?”

No answer.

He pushed a different sequence of buttons he tried his helmet, “Hello? Can anyone hear me?”

Still nothing.

“ _Shit,_ ” Shiro was walking towards the Black and Blue Lions but after getting no answer he picked up the pace. Since he wasn’t inside Voltron when it was forced apart, it was possible he was the only one up and moving. “ _Please, let them be ok,_ ” Shiro thought to himself.

“Shiro!” His name cut through intense static.

“Coran! You can hear me?” A moment of relief washed over Shiro.

“Barely, how are you? What about the others? What does it look like down there?”

“ _Down there,_ ” Shiro thought, Coran must still be in orbit. “I’m ok. All the lions are all accounted for but they’re not responding. No word from the paladins, I’m coming up on Black and Blue.”

“I’ll stay in the upper atmosphere to scan for approaching enemies in case they followed us. I doubt they could track us if all of the lions are powered down but keep me posted,” Coran requested.

“Of course,” Shiro confirmed.

As he approached the lions, Shiro noticed two figures in the front. Keith was helping Allura down out of the lion. “Hey!” Shiro called waving and jogging the rest of the way even though his body screamed its protest to the movement.

”Shiro,” Keith answered as he helped Allura to Blue’s paw.

“Are you two ok?” Shiro asked as he approached, eyeing Allura.

“Yeah,” Keith affirmed.

“Just drained,” Allura answered as she leaned on the paw and looked up at the sky. “That Komar magic is something else.”

“The others?” Keith asked leaning on the paw too. It was clear he was just as tired but trying to mask it.

“I don’t know yet, the Komar must have drained your suits’ power cells along with the lions. The radio’s been silent since the crash landing,” Shiro explained. “I got through to Coran with a lot of static.” “Coran!” Shiro called into his comms.

“Shiro?”

“Keith and Allura are ok, just exhausted,” Shiro updated.

“Thank the stars.” Shiro knew that the relief was more in regards to Allura’s safety. “That makes sense though, it’s honestly a wonder Voltron can manage to take the full brunt of that Komar. It’s meant to destroy entire planets,” Coran reminded. “Any word from the others?”

“Nothing yet,” Shiro looked at the lions in the distance, “Green is closest to here, I’ll go there next.”

“I’ll go with you,” Keith pushed up to stand next to Shiro.

“Allura, can you stay in case Hunk or Lance make their way here?” Shiro asked.

“Yes,” Allura assured, immediately following Shiro’s logic. If there was anywhere to go, it would be where there are two lions together.

“Let’s go,” Shiro turned towards the Green Lion. He swallowed hard. “ _Surely, Pidge would be fine,_ ” Shiro thought, not letting any other thought overshadow it. He didn’t want to think about any other possibility.

After spending so much time with Matt and Sam, if anything happened to Pidge on his watch, it would truly haunt him for the rest of his days. Shiro’s sense of responsibility is second to none.

Upon approach, the two guys could hear clanging coming from inside the Green Lion. Keith raised an eyebrow at Shiro as they made their way to the head.

“Pidge?” Keith yelled.

A muffled, “Keith?” responded from inside.

“Shiro’s here too,” Keith answered.

“Allura? Hunk? Lance?” Pidge asked.

“Allura’s fine. We haven’t heard from Lance or Hunk yet,” Shiro supplied.

“Well, I’m stuck in here. The door won’t open without power.”

“Have you tried the manual hatch on the stomach?” Keith asked.

“Based on the orientation, I figured it was buried.”

“Head over there, we can try to dig the door free from out here,” Shiro turned to make his way to the hatch. Yelling was not agreeing with his injured rib. He put a hand to his side, hoping that it would calm the throbbing.

“You ok?” Keith asked as he jogged up next to Shiro.

“Yeah, fine,” Shiro dismissed.

“Hm,” Keith responded. Shiro knew Keith was doubting him but didn’t want to push.

“I might have a bruised rib, but I can manage for now,” Shiro admitted, feeling guilty for trying to hide the injury.

“You shouldn’t be-” Keith started.

“Yeah, yeah,” Shiro rolled his eyes, “I shouldn’t do a lot of things but have you considered, I don’t care?”

The two of them approached the half-buried hatch. Keith walked up first and easily moved some of the dirt aside with his boot. “ _Should be easy enough to dig through,_ ” Shiro thought.

“Shiro?! Oh god, Shiro please” Hunk cried through the static in his helmet.

“Hunk!? I’m here, can you hear me?” Shiro yelled back. The static whirred and cracked in his ear. Hunk’s tone was frantic, was he injured? Were there enemies?

The first part of Hunk’s sentence was lost to the static. Shiro could only make out a few sound bytes, something about getting out of his lion, something about the energy and the end, “Lance is hurt.”


	2. Shock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro reacts to Hunk's distress call. What kind of scene is he about to witness?

Shiro’s stomach bottomed out, flipped upside down, then got caught in his throat in half a second.

“What’s happening?” Keith asked, concerned.

“I’m not sure, Hunk was crying, and Lance might be hurt?” Shiro’s mind raced. “Stay here, get Pidge out of their lion then head towards Yellow,” Shiro commanded of Keith as he started in the direction of the Yellow Lion.

“Ok, be careful,” Keith called after Shiro as he began clawing at the dirt, “We’ll be there soon.”

Shiro could just make out Pidge asking, “What’s going on?” from the other side of the door. Shiro didn’t stick around to hear Keith’s response.

The journey to the Yellow Lion felt like it was going to take all day, his limbs felt like they were moving through Jello. All he knew was Lance was hurt, but Hunk might be too. How did it happen? Was it the fall? Were there enemies? Coran hadn’t mentioned it. He didn’t hear anything that sounded like laser blasts over the comms nor now that he was coming up to the scene. The Yellow Lion appeared shut-down from a distance but as Shiro approached, there was no denying the glow found in her eyes. “ _Hunk must have restored some power to get out of his lion_ ,” Shiro assumed. A quick scan of the area revealed no one was here.

The Red Lion wasn’t far. Shiro opened his helmet and took it off to wipe his face. It was sweatier than he thought it should be. “ _Part heat exhaustion, part shock from the injured rib_ ,” Shiro reasoned before shoving his helmet back on and pushing himself further, whatever it was, he would deal with it later.

Shiro’s blood ran cold as he found Hunk hovering over Lance’s body. As he approached, it became apparent Hunk was giving CPR. “Hunk,” Shiro whispered in a hoarse voice then called out louder after clearing his throat, “Hunk!” Shiro ran as fast as he could manage.

Hunk whipped his head around and tears were streaming down his face.

Shiro slid through the dirt and sand next to Lance taking over for Hunk doing compressions.

Hunk rambled, “I must have gotten out first since Yellow powers up quickly in the sun, Red was the closest so I walked over, and he wasn’t answering so then I opened the manual hatch and he wasn’t breathing,” Hunk whimpered and sniffled.

“I’m here Hunk,” Shiro offered as if it was some comfort, “Have you been doing the breaths?”

“No, after pulling him out of the lion and with the heat and I was hyperventilating because panic and I should have,” Hunk answered his ragged breaths becoming calmer.

Hunk’s change in disposition didn’t sit well with Shiro, “It’s ok Hunk, you would have probably passed out after a few minutes between everything. I’ll start doing the breaths. When did you get through to me?” “ _Just keep Hunk talking_ ,” Shiro thought as he pinched Lance’s nose and leaned his head back to open the airway. 

“After I pulled him out,” Hunk replied.

After a deep inhalation that pained Shiro’s side, he locked his mouth over Lance’s pushing as much air as he could into Lance’s lungs. He repeated once more.

 “Shiro,” Hunk whimpered.

“I’m not letting him die,” Shiro growled. With a quick tap of his wrist, Shiro yelled, “Coran!”

“Shiro?” Coran answered sensing the tension.

“Lance isn’t breathing, we need you to find a way to administer a shock to his heart.”

“Without the castle,” Coran started.

“You need to find a way,” Shiro urged then looked over at Hunk, “There’s gotta be a way.”

Hunk started, “If we can track vital signs remotely then there has to be a way to reverse the feedback, I have an idea, tell Coran-”

Shiro ripped off his helmet, “Tell him yourself.” It wasn’t meant to be brusk but Lance demanded his focus.

Hunk put on the helmet to explain his idea.

Shiro felt himself start dissociating. He was watching the scene from somewhere over his own shoulder. This happened every so often ever since spending so long on the astral plane. “ _Not now, not now, not now_ ,” Shiro chanted and forced himself to as present as he could. He provided two more breaths.

“Alright that should do it,” Hunk confirmed, “Hands clear Shiro.”

Shiro pulled back quickly, “Do it.”

“Go Coran.”

Lance’s body tensed then relaxed. There was no movement, no breath, nothing.

“Again,” Shiro demanded.

Lance’s muscles strained again then released.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're the best and I appreciate you!


	3. Regroup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team takes a breather (maybe pun intended) to figure out what happened.

Shiro looked to Hunk first, Hunk nodded. After a breath of his own, Shiro checked Lance’s pulse on his neck under his jaw. “It worked.” 

The relief was tangible.

“He needs oxygen. Where’s his helmet?” Shiro asked looking around the area.

“Maybe in the lion?” Hunk assumed.

“It’s probably out of power,” Shiro tugged at his bottom lip trying to figure out what to do then it clicked, “Use mine.”

Hunk took off the helmet. Shiro carefully lifted Lance’s head and Hunk slipped the helmet on. Hunk pushed the button on the side to close the visor and turn on the filtration as Shiro gently placed Lance’s head back on the sandy ground.

They watched as Lance’s breath fogged the mask front a couple of times. The breaths weren’t as deep as Shiro would have liked but they were steady. He breathed his own deep sigh of relief. Lance’s breaths weren’t short erratic gasps usually found with cardiac arrest. They were through the worst of it and Lance would be ok. “Lance will be ok,” Shiro repeated to himself, finally allowing himself to feel the dissociation from earlier. He relaxed back to sit on his heels and let his arms drop at his sides. It felt like hours passed in a few seconds. Shiro’s mind ebbed and flowed from nothing to the infinite and back to nothing. He was brought back to present in Hunk’s embrace.

Hunk was muttering, “Thank you, Shiro, it’s all right, it’s going to be alright.”

Shiro embraced Hunk back, “It was all you, Hunk you’re a genius,” with a tighter hug and softer voice he added, “Thank _you_.”

“Hey!” Keith yelled as he ran followed by Pidge.

Pidge stopped for a second, taking in the scene then ducked their head and sprinted past Keith. “What happened?” They shouted as they ran to hold onto Lance’s arm.

Hunk released Shiro slowly, making sure Shiro would support himself.

Shiro tried nodding for reassurance.

Hunk moved carefully around Lance. 

Keith locked eyes with Hunk trying to assess what happened. 

Hunk started crying again. “Keith,” He whined.

There was only a second where Keith was clearly frozen with fear but he pushed it down and was quickly clutching at Hunk seeking as much comfort from Hunk as Hunk was from him.

“What happened?!” Pidge yelled for an answer.

“He wasn’t breathing,” Shiro provided the bad news first, “But thanks to Hunk, he’s back.”

“How?” Pidge asked as tears formed in their eyes.

“I think it was the Komar,” Shiro started. “From what I remember,” Shiro rubbed his face trying to rub the memory clearer, “Lance moved his arm of Voltron in front, shouldering the first half of the blast before he was blown back and then Voltron was drained of its remaining power and forced apart.”

“How did you end up crashing down with us?” Keith asked, still keeping an arm around Hunk’s back.

“I was knocked off course when the Komar hit you all and then when Voltron broke apart, I think I was clipped by Blue?” Shiro answered.

“What kind of shape was your craft when you got out?” Hunk now asked.

“I…” Shiro hadn’t even tried to find his ship, “don’t know. I was ejected at some point and woke up on the ground.” He leaned back and let his legs stretch in front of him, “It might be salvageable wherever it is but I think Yellow is our best bet of repowering the lions.”

“I can work on a tethering system,” Pidge offered still looking down at Lance. 

Hunk moved over to wrap an arm around Pidge’s shoulders.

Lance groaned and everyone stiffened. When he tried to sit up everyone seemed to rush forward. 

“Whoa!” Lance startled realizing everyone was in his space. Then realized he was being held down by his shoulders, the hands holding him down were connected to Shiro. “What-” he started.

“You stopped breathing!” Hunk whisper yelled, his emotions threatening to overflow again.

“Oh shit,” Lance exhaled, realization washing over him.

“‘Oh shit,’ is right!” Pidge burst.

Lance winced at the sudden loud noise.

Pidge adjusted their volume but with the same passion, “Why did you jump in front of the Komar?”

Lance looked up and closed his eyes to recall it to the front of his memory. “I don’t know, I guess I was just caught up in the moment?”

“Not good enough!” Pidge lightly punched down on Lance’s chest.

“I’m sorry?” Lance asked actually confused Pidge was fighting him on this.

“You heard me,” their finger wagged in Lance’s face. “That’s not an excuse, you could have easily just taken the hit with the rest of Voltron, with the rest of us!”

No one moved, most likely thinking the same as Pidge. 

“Alright, alright,” Shiro sighed pushing Pidge’s shoulder to move their body out of Lance’s face. “We can talk about it later but right now we need to work a way up off this planet. Hunk, the Yellow Lion is probably charged enough to be able to walk around, get your lion over to Pidge and Green and see if you can’t figure out a way to jump-start the other lions. Keith, head back over to Allura, make sure she’s still ok and let her know the situation.”

Keith nodded and turned toward the two lions but then abruptly spun around.

“I’ll stay with Lance,” Shiro cut off whatever question Keith was going to ask. When Keith didn’t move, Shiro added, “I’m fine, we’re fine. Right, Lance?”

From his place on the ground, Lance raised a thumbs up to Keith.

Finally rolling his eyes, Keith started his trek to the Black and Blue Lions.

Shiro let out a small grunt as he shifted his sitting position. He leaned back like before but his rib protested this time so he laid all the way down.

Lance looked over and shot Shiro a questioning look.

“It’s been a long day, Lance,” Shiro groaned.

“I didn’t say anything,” Lance defended. 

Shiro shook his head and placed his hands behind his neck.

“Is Allura ok?”

“Yep, just tired. You know how she overworks herself, she was probably already drained before fighting.”

“True, and is Coran ok?”

“He’s good, he’s in the upper atmosphere patrolling until we can get up there.”

“Ah makes sense, and you? Are you ok?” Lance asked.

Shiro laughed and abruptly stopped when the pain flared. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” 

“Maybe?” Lance shrugged.

“Well I’m fine,” Shiro said.

“Of course, we’re fine,” Lance repeated, “Just like you lied to Keith,”

“I didn’t lie,” now Shiro defended, “Did I?” He looked over to Lance for confirmation.

“Nope,” Lance confirmed, he raised a hand to his heart, “My heart is still beating isn’t it?”

“Barely,” Shiro murmured.

Lance laughed, “You got me. So what’s up with you?”

Shiro shrugged.

“Come on man, you’re clearly hurting, so what’s up?”

“Nothi-”

“Seriously?” Lance sat up leaning on an elbow. “Are you lying to me or yourself?”

Shiro looked back at Lance with wide eyes, surprised by his sudden insightfulness, “I uh, might have a broken rib?” Shiro couldn’t even try to hide the fact in front of Lance’s honest face.

“Jesus Shiro, take care of yourself, will you?” Lance flopped back on his back.

“I’ll try,” Shiro laughed this time, “Only if you do the same.”

“I’ll try,” Lance smiled, then got serious, “I don’t know why I jumped in front of that blast.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Shiro looked into the sky, “I probably would have done the same. In the moment, you do what you have to, it’s all adrenaline.”

“Hmm, I guess,” Lance looked over at Shiro.

Shiro looked back to answer Lance’s next question, he always had another question.

Lance had opened his mouth then paused. “Yeah Coran, I’m ok,” Lance sat up before Shiro could protest.

Shiro tried to roll up to sitting as well but his abdominal muscles howled their objection, so he rolled to his side and pushed up with his arms.

Lance was nodding along to whatever Coran was saying but his eyes were tracking Shiro’s struggle over the simple task of sitting up.

Embarrassment hit Shiro hard. To cover it up, he busied himself checking his robotic prosthesis. 

“I know, yes... I do!” Lance defended. “I know it could have been worse…”

Shiro dared a peek at Lance, he was focussed on his shoes with his hands on either side of the helmet somewhat hiding Shiro’s view of his face. He could see Lance’s eyebrows upturned threatening to spill his emotions. Coran must be laying into him, Shiro’s been there. 

Coran is just worried but his lack of delicacy usually doesn’t help these kinds of situations when you already feel like shit. 

Without really thinking, Shiro leaned over and placed his left hand over Lance’s right hand. Shiro pressed the face shield button. Once it opened, Shiro said, “Coran, I know you’re worried but we can talk about it later, right now we need to focus on getting off this planet.” Shiro backed off to where he was sitting beside Lance, a little closer than before to be able to hear Coran through the helmet.

Lance, with wide eyes and a slack jaw, was frozen.


	4. Getting Back on Your Feet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A change of perspective offers a new way of seeing things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a note, I've changed POV to Lance. Eventually, I'll switch back to Shiro so if you prefer Shiro POV, you might have to skip a couple of chapters. Also, I know POV switching is not everyone's cup of tea, so you've been warned.

“Shiro?” Coran questions.

A dry-mouthed Lance answers, “Uh, it’s still me.” “ _Did that just happen?_ ” He thinks.

“Oh, sorry Lance. Shiro’s right, what can we do, can I help?”

“Uhmm,” Lance paused trying to remember the positions Shiro assigned. “Hunk and Pidge are working on something with the Yellow Lion.”

“And what is that?”

After a gulp, Lance continued, “The Yellow Lion started powering up. They’re going to work on a way to transfer the power to the other lions.”

Shiro nodded at the evaluation.

Lance was so hyper-aware of Shiro’s proximity that he could swear he felt the movement as if it were his own.

“And Allura?” Cora continued, triple checking her well-being.

“Allura’s ok,” Lance looked over to Shiro for confirmation.

Shiro nodded back enthusiastically.

Lance blinked and turned away, “ _God, Shiro, those eyes, why are you always so sincere?_ ” “Everyone’s a little beat up, some more than others,” Lance said in reference about Shiro’s probably broken rib, ignoring or forgetting his own near-death experience, “but we’re ok.”

“Listen, I am so relieved that you’re all ok this time but you got lucky Lance,” Coran was clearly about to spiral into his earlier rant.

Lance sighed, accepting his fate when the helmet was forcefully yanked off his head. He grabbed his ears out of surprise. Quickly he realized the movement was silly so he let his arms fall into his lap as he watched Shiro put the helmet on.

“Hold that thought, Coran, we’ll check back in once we have news,” Shiro tapped a button on his wrist, then a button on the helmet and then his wrist. “There we go, some radio silence never hurt anyone, right?” Shiro smirked and Lance turned to mush. 

“R-right,” Lance stammered.

Shiro extended the helmet back to Lance. “I guess we should head over to Allura and Keith before Keith thinks we died in the desert.” Shiro took a deep breath before clearly forcing himself to stand. At first, Shiro turned to offer his hand to help Lance up. He then remembered and squat down. Softly he asked, “Can you walk?”

There wasn’t any judgment, just genuine concern. Lance wanted to be able to say yes but he really didn’t know. “ _If Shiro could stand with a broken rib, I can stand too,_ ” Lance cheered himself on as he put the helmet back on. With a struggle, he stood, his legs wobbling. He grabbed Shiro’s shoulder and mumbled, “Sorry, head rush.”

Shiro grasped his wrist and moved Lance’s hand to his other shoulder as he himself stood. Shiro hunched only slightly to compensate for the height difference. It was to make sure Lance was comfortable. “I’ve got you, buddy,” Shiro supported Lance’s frame but there was an edge to his voice.

“How far are they?” Lance took the first step on their path.

“Mmm, maybe three hundred yards?” They only just started their trek but Shiro’s forehead was already shiny with sweat.

“ _That’s not good,_ ” Lance noted.


	5. Support

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slow going to regroup with the others and some simple bonding.

The first part of the journey was mostly Shiro supporting Lance but by the time they reached the Black and Blue Lions they were supporting each other. Both were winded by the effort but at least Lance had the helmet to filter the air for him. Lance peeked at Shiro. He looked pale but he didn’t slow down or ask for breaks. Out of worry, Lance asked, “Can we stop for a second?”

“Of course!” Shiro immediately stopped and let Lance go. 

Lance found a rock to lean on. He watched Shiro stretch his back and swallow a wince. 

Shiro scanned the area and Lance copied. They were really close to the lions, close enough to see Allura and Keith sitting under the shade of the lions but the two hadn’t seen them approaching yet.

While Lance had been preoccupied, Shiro moved to the other side of the rock. A small bump on Lance’s back made him acknowledge Shiro sitting behind him. 

Lance froze again, “ _What is happening?_ ” Lance paused, trying to find a natural time to speak up, “Are you-”

“Lance I-” Shiro started at the same time.

They both stopped to let the other finish resulting in silence. Uncomfortable, Lance snickered, “Go ahead.”

“No, you first,” Shiro insisted.

“Oh, I was just going to ask if you were feeling ok?” Lance asked.

There was a pause while Shiro gave it thought. Lance could feel his small controlled breaths that couldn’t be described as anything other than shallow. Lance felt him shrug first, “It’s nothing that I can’t handle, you shouldn’t worry about me, how are you doing?”

Lance had almost forgotten he was the one that asked for a break, “Uh, I’m better now after resting,” he fibbed. 

Shiro sighed, “Do you want to keep going?”

“In a little bit,” Lance suggested.

“Sure thing,” Lance heard the small smile in Shiro’s voice.

There was a comfortable silence. The wind kicked up briefly but died down.

“What were you going to say?” Lance asked.

“Huh?”

“Before, when we spoke at the same time,” Lance prompted.

“Oh,” Shiro answered slowly, “Um,” now he was stalling or looking for the words. After a considerable amount of time, Shiro continued, “Lance-”

“Lance! Shiro!”

The two of them looked to see Allura waving. 

“We better get down there,” Shiro pushed off the rock, clearly dropping the subject.

Lance vowed to get to the bottom of this later but for now, he decided not to push it, “Yeah, before Keith comes up here and drags us down himself would be preferable.”

Shiro laughed while offering a hand to pull Lance off the rock.

This was one of those moments where Lance wishes he could freeze time. 

Slowly, as if it would break the spell to move any faster, Lance reached up to take the proffered hand. Shiro gripped his hand carefully, Lance noticed. “ _Was Shiro worried about hurting someone with his robotic arm? Was he worried about hurting me specifically?_ ” Lance questioned but before he could think any other thoughts he was pulled to his feet. 

“Whoa,” Shiro caught Lance easily. Shiro had overestimated his strength and pulled Lance too far.

“Sorry.” Somehow Lance felt he was the one who should apologize for invading Shiro’s space.

“No, it’s my fault, sorry.” Shiro stepped to create space, “Do you still need help walking?”

It was awkward so Lance saved them both the trouble, “It’s not much farther now, I’ll be ok.”

With some scrabbling down the dune’s side, they were reunited with Allura and Keith. Allura embraced Lance. “Keith told me, and I’m so glad you’re ok.”

Lance hugged her back, “I’m sorry for worrying you.” Lance took a second to look at Keith and Shiro’s reunion. 

Shiro looked pained but in a way that was different than what would be caused by a broken rib. Keith looked worried in a way that only Keith could be, he looked angry but working to hide it. Keith was saying something that Lance couldn’t hear from where he stood.

Allura backed up to look at all of Lance, “How was your lion?”

Lance shrugged, “Dead in the water, just like these two,” He motioned to the two lions behind them.

“Was Yellow really powered up?” Allura gestured to the paw that she had been sitting by before.

The pair of them moved to take a seat, “From what Hunk said, yes, at least enough to move around. I don’t know if she’s up to flying just yet.”

“Wow,” Allura sighed, “These lions always amaze me.”

“Yep, they sure are amazing,” but Lance could feel his heart wasn’t in the conversation. He was just tired. His body wanted nothing more than a soft bed and darkness. Yet here he was, dusty and sweating out in this dessert.

“Lance? I asked why are you wearing Shiro’s helmet?” Allura repeated.

“Oh! Sorry, I must have zoned out there,” Lance fumbled for words, “Shiro gave it to me to breathe easier I think.”

“Oh right, without power, your helmet would be useless. It’s lucky his helmet still worked even after his fall.”

“You saw him fall?”

“Well not really. When Voltron broke apart, I remember hitting his ship,” She looked away, embarrassed. “I saw as we entered this planet’s atmosphere that he had been ejected but Blue started spinning out of control and I lost sight of... Well, everything actually.”

Lance wrapped a supportive arm around Allura, “It’s not your fault. How did you end up like this?” He nodded to the lions.

“I don’t know how but Keith must have had control of the Black Lion until hitting the planet. He guided his lion into mine to stop the spinning but there wasn’t enough time for him to slow us down.”

“I’m glad he was there to help you.”

“And I’m glad you’re here now,” Allura wrapped her arm around Lance as she rested her head on his shoulder.

“ _Me too_ ,” Lance thought. As much as he joked about death, when actually facing the possibility, Lance’s blood curdled and he shivered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all are so great and I thank you for your patience with my slow uploads! All the love!


	6. Hunk Tells All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance POV
> 
> Hunk comes clean about the situation around saving Lance's life.

Unsurprisingly, Hunk and Pidge worked out a way to transfer power to the other lions. Within an hour or so, everyone was on their way up to meet with Coran. 

Shiro volunteered to drive the Black Lion so Keith could drive Red for Lance. Lance protested and was driving himself with Shiro watching over his shoulder as a compromise. 

“I forgot to say thank you!” Lance whipped around in his seat.

Shiro jumped at the sudden noise, “What?”

“Thank you! For saving my life! God, I must have hit my head, how could I forget to say thank you!?” Lance shook his head, “Who was it that revived me? I owe them big time.”

“It was mostly Hunk, make sure to thank him when we board Coran’s ship,” Shiro smiled as Lance was focused back on his lack of manners.

“Of course I will!” Lance confirmed with determination.

Lance docked the Red Lion and quickly exited, leaving Shiro behind. He was a man on a mission.

“Hunk!?” Lance called into the bay.

“Lance?!” Hunk answered as he exited his own lion.

“Come here, big guy!” Lance jogged over to Hunk and squeezed him in his arms. “Thank you, thank you, thank you! I literally owe you my life man! I’m sorry that I didn’t say it sooner.”

Hunk smiled and returned with his own squeeze. “I’m just relieved you pulled through.” 

Lance started leading the two of them towards their shared sleeping quarters, arms still wrapped around the other, “I’m a fighter, Hunk, you know that!”

“I do, yeah,” Hunk admitted, “but for a minute there…”

“It had to have been scary, I’m sorry.”

“Oh no! Lance, don’t apologize! If I’m being real with you,” Hunk opened the door to the bedroom, “I was panicking. Like full-blown attack. I couldn’t think straight.” He shrugged off this chest armor. “When you needed me the most, I had a panic attack.”

“Hey, don’t beat yourself up,” Lance placed a hand on Hunk’s shoulder.

“I just wish I could control my nerves like even a little bit.” Hunk paused, “I wouldn’t have frozen up.” Hunk threw down the hard shell pieces of his armor as he continued, “Fuck, you would have actually died because of me if Shiro wasn’t there to take control of the situation.” Hunk’s anger at himself was filling the room.

“Wh-” Lance started but Hunk pushed on.

“Goddammit, my best friend was dying or I guess, technically dead?? Right in front of me and the only things my body would let me do was cry and call for help,” Hunk fell back onto his mattress and covered his face, “How pathetic.”

“ _ We’ll come back to Shiro being involved _ ,” Lance thought, “ _ Hunk needs me right now. _ ” “ Hey, no way! Hunk, you said that you couldn’t even think straight,” Lance plopped down at the end of the bed, “but firstly you recognized that you were panicking, secondly knew you couldn’t help and then ultimately called for someone who could.”

“I guess…” 

“And you came to find me, did you get me out of Red?”

“Yeah.”

“That was good thinking because there’s no room in the lions,” Lance added, “And I’m sure that even in a panicked state you did something like CPR or-”

“That was mostly Shiro,” Hunk interrupted. “I started but when it wasn’t doing anything…” He trailed off looking at his hands.

“Hunk,” Lance took Hunk’s hand and put it on his chest so he could feel his heartbeat, “I’m still here.”

“But if Shiro hadn’t been there giving CPR, then I wouldn’t have been put together enough to even continue with the bare minimum of chest compressions and I, for sure, wouldn’t have even thought of administering a defib shock.” Hunk took back his hand, “It was amazing Lance. I know we joke about it all the time but Shiro really did swoop in and did everything right without a second thought.” Hunk sat up next to Lance, “No wonder he was your hero at the garrison.”

Lance cracked a smile, “I’m glad you’ve finally come around. It’s like I’ve been saying forever, Shiro’s the real deal! An actual hero!” Lance stood and flexed his arms in a heroic pose.

Hunk finally smiled, “Yeah, yeah,” He rolled his eyes at Lance’s silly pose but laughed despite himself, “But you’re not wrong, it was crazy. He came sliding in, picked up the compressions and breaths and all at the same time calming me down and talking to Coran. I want to be like Shiro when I grow up.” Hunk got up to continue to remove his armor to take a shower and entered the attached bathroom.

Lance was left in the room alone. Shiro hadn’t lied when he said it was mostly Hunk who had saved his life but Hunk made it seem like it wasn’t even in the realm of possibility if Shiro wasn’t there. Subconsciously, Lance lifted a hand to his mouth. “ _ As if! _ ” Lance admonished as he worked himself out of his paladin suit. 


	7. Almost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro POV
> 
> Something big almost happens. But it doesn't :/

“ _ This is crazy, right? _ ” Shiro stood outside Lance and Hunk’s room.

“ _ Definitely _ ,” Shiro answered himself. He had come to check on Lance. But Lance was dorming with Hunk, if he needed anything surely Hunk would be the first Lance would ask for help. Shiro turned to leave. 

Once he was halfway down the hall, the door he was just in front of, opened. Lance peeked out.

“Shiro! I thought I heard footsteps,” Lance called and came out into the hall. 

Shiro stopped and turned.

Lance had removed his armor and had the upper-body of the black undersuit pulled down to his hips. 

Shiro gulped and confirmed that he had definitely come to check up on Lance at the wrong time. Trying to be casual, he asked, “Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Pretty good, all things considered.”

“That’s good to hear.” He wished Lance would just go back into his room.

“What're you doing down this way?” Lance questioned.

Shiro’s room was in the opposite direction he had just been heading, “Oh you know, just doing some rounds, making sure everything is accounted for.”

“Ah,” Lance thought for a second, “Have you gotten your rib checked out yet?”

“Not yet,” Shiro had started when he caught Lance’s shocked look so he explained, “I figured you should have first go at the healing pod to be safe.”

“You’re seriously amazing,” Lance sighed.

Shiro wasn’t sure if he should take it as a compliment but Lance’s tone didn’t feel like one of praise, so he stayed quiet.

“The longer you wait the worse it is for you,” Lance started lecturing. He crossed his arms, “If it really is broken it could cause a lot of problems internally, especially after running around on that planet.”

“I know but you,” Shiro countered.

Lance interrupted, “But nothing. I’m going to go take a shower and you’re going to get in that healing pod.”

“Ok,” Shiro conceded, a little surprised by Lance’s pushiness on this. “Ok, I’ll head over now.”

“You said that you were going to put effort into self preservation,” Lance reminded.

“You’re right, sorry.” Shiro walked past to show he really was going. 

Once Shiro was past him, Lance interjected, “Wait.”

Shiro obeyed. He slowly turned on his heels to face Lance.

“Before,” Lance started, “What were you going to say when we were resting?”

Shiro thought back, he knew what he was going to say then but questioned if he had the courage to say it now.

“Remember when we were sitting on the rock?” Lance prompted.

“Yeah, I remember.” Shiro paused to think of something, anything that wasn’t the truth, any lie would do. When he looked at Lance, the earnest expression he found was enough to change his mind to settle on a half-truth. “What I was going to say was that I was scared.”

“What?” It was clear that Lance wasn’t expecting this.

Shiro rubbed the back of his neck as he looked away, “When you were hurt,” he changed his mind to be specific, “when you weren’t breathing, I was scared that we, I lost you.”

“Shiro, it wasn’t your fault, you can’t b-”

“Blame myself?” Shiro finished. “No, it’s not that, not this time,” he laughed shortly as he looked for the words. “Look Lance, I didn’t want this to be how I said this.” 

“What is it, Shiro?”

Shiro swallowed, somehow more afraid than he ever has been. “I…”

“Lance, your turn for the shower! Oh hey Shiro!” Hunk greeted from the doorway.

“Hi, Hunk. How are you doing?” Shiro smiled. 

“I’m fine, kind of sore but nothing new,” Hunk shrugged, still not noticing the tension in the hall. “How are you?”

“Oh, I’m a little banged up so I’m heading to the healing pod now." He turned to leave.

“Of course,” Hunk said more to himself than either of them in the hallway. 

Shiro started to walk away before any more conversation could start.

“See you at dinner?” Hunk called.

“Wouldn’t miss it!” Shiro waved without looking back. Had he really considered confessing to Lance just then? “ _ It’s obviously NOT the right time, Lance almost died today, how can I be so selfish? _ ” Shiro berated himself the whole way to the pod.


	8. Believe in the Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still in Shiro’s point of view - He gets in the healing pod and works through some things with the help of a good friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for being so patient! My computer gave me the blue screen of death so I haven’t really been able to work on any of my wips as easily as before. In fact, I’m uploading this from my tablet lol. Until I get a new computer, I’m sorry for the sporadic uploads!

Shiro took a detour on his way to the healing pod they staged in the control room. He opened his room and breathed out in relief when it was dark, meaning his roommate, Keith, wasn’t in. 

“You’re back early,” a voice cut through the darkness.

Shiro jumped but hoped the darkness would hide it. He clutched his chest, “Geez, Keith, I thought you were out, why are you sitting in the dark?”

“It helps me relax, the lights can be… I don’t know, harsh?” Keith sounded like he had never vocalized it before.

“Yeah, I get that,” Shiro agreed. He moved towards the opposite side of the room from Keith’s voice. His eyes hadn’t totally adjusted to the dark so he shuffled until his shins hit the edge of the cot. Once he made contact, he sat and rubbed his face with a groan.

“What’s up?” Keith asked.

“Nothing important,” Shiro answered, signaling he didn’t want to talk about it.

Keith seemed to pick that up, “Did you get to the healing pod?”

“Not yet,” he knew his answers were curt but he was still rehashing his exchange with Lance in the hallway.

“Why not?”

“I got… distracted, I’ll go now,” Shiro pushed off his bed. Keith was feeling chatty and there was no way Shiro could stay and keep brushing him off. Eventually, he’d spill everything. “Can’t even be alone in my room...” Shiro mumbled.

“What?” Keith shuffled around in his bed.

“Nothing!” With a blush spreading from ear to ear, Shiro left the room and jogged down the hall towards the control room. He was hoping that there would be no one there, or if there was, they’d let him jump in the pod without question.

The door whisked open. A quick scan of the room revealed no one inside. Shiro went right over to the pod and selected the settings. He had watched Coran do it enough times to know what to hit without knowing exactly what the Altean symbols meant.

Shiro stepped in and the door shut. As the cold air filled the chamber, he immediately felt the anesthetic take action. Once his aches were gone, he finally felt fully relaxed and let the chamber carry him off to sleep.

He wished for a peaceful sleep but it wasn’t going to go his way today.

The first image to take shape was Voltron breaking apart, each lion hurtling in different directions. From Shiro’s point of view, there was nothing he could do to keep them together. He yelled but no sound escaped. The scene changed and he watched Keith as he competed in the trial set forth by the Blades. They kept Shiro from interfering even when Keith was badly injured. Then the scene changed again and Shiro watched Matt get pulled from the prisoner lineup. Shiro couldn’t follow as he was being dragged into the gladiator ring. The scene changed and he watched as Allura was surrounded and his escape pod left her behind. 

Seeing all of these scenes back to back left him unbelievably frustrated. Again he yelled and again the catharsis of hearing his anger expressed was denied him when he was met with silence. The scene changed once more and Shiro tried not to participate. He recognized it as a dream now and started to gain control but then he became aware of where he was. It was the same planet they were just on. Hunk was in the distance and realization dawned on Shiro. He was trying to run to Hunk because he knew Lance was in trouble. No matter how fast he ran, he never got any closer. “No, no! I helped him. He’s ok!” Shiro yelled in his thoughts. 

Still trying to fight his own legs, the scene changed one final time. Shiro was released from the spell holding him in one spot and tumbled forward into the darkness. He pushed himself up to a seated position with his feet crossed in front of him. 

“If I’m not allowed to talk then fine,” Shiro thought as he closed his eyes to meditate. 

Slowly in the dark abyss, the Black Lion appeared. It’s not the huge metal spaceship that materialized but the earth version of a lion. She had soft fur and a glow that shimmered like the stars. Shiro felt her pace around him and stretched an arm out. She nuzzled her face into his palm. In an instant, they were communicating in a deeper way. 

Shiro radiated anxiety and frustration into the lion’s mind and she accepted his feelings. She started sending her own messages of praise and pride. When Shiro fought against the positive emotions, the Black Lion showed a situation with Keith that made Shiro laugh. His eyes open quickly, “I can talk!” The lion blinked slowly at him with a small nod.

“I’m sorry to call you here even though I’m not your paladin anymore.” Shiro looked down at his ankles.

After a second, Shiro’s shoulder was nudged. He looked over and when his eyes met hers, he felt her sentiment, “You will always be my paladin.”

“Thanks,” Shiro smiled, now consoled and encouraged. If nothing else worked out, at least he had this.

“So, the blue paladin,” the lion purred into his thoughts.

Shiro avoided eye contact, “A-allura?” He feigned ignorance, “She’s great.”

“Not her,” the Black Lion sat opposite Shiro. They both knew who she was referring to.

Shiro sighed, no use trying to hide something from a lion that can read your mind. “Yeah, I don’t think it’s a good time.”

“Oh?” She relaxed to have her paws in front of her while laying down.

“And I don’t even know if he has feelings for me like that. Lance is a good guy but he flirts with everyone, it’s hard to know if he means it. What if he doesn’t like me in that way and he thinks I’m some sort of creep? Then things would get awkward and I think that’s somehow worse that just not saying anything.” The words flowed from Shiro’s mouth before he could stop himself.

“What if he does like you in that way?” She used his words.

“H-how do you know that?” Shiro’s mind was short circuiting.

“I don’t.” The lion yawned and rested her head on her paws. “But you’ve prepared yourself for the worst case scenario, what if the best case scenario were to happen? You put faith in those around you, you believe the best in everyone, but you do not do yourself this kindness. Trust in yourself and what your instincts tell you, whether it is on the battlefield or in love. Believe in the good.”


	9. Heart Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post-healing pod, Shiro bumps into Lance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so patient. So much happened since my last update. My computer blue screened and I just recently got a replacement. I also got a promotion at work and I think I finally settled into the role. Thank you again for your support and your understanding!

The pod beeped and stirred Shiro from the dream.

“I guess I have to go,” he didn’t want to though.

“Yes, are you feeling better?” The Black Lion asked.

Shiro patted his rib, no pain. “I think so.”

She stood and asked, “What about here?” as she nosed over his heart.

Shiro smiled at her softly, “Yes, thank you for listening. I’ve missed you.” He lifted his hand to pet her behind her ear and down her neck.

“I’m always with you, Shiro,” She leaned into his touch and began to fade. The stars in her coat started to scatter around him.

Shiro opened his eyes to the frosted window on the pod. The machinations whirred and the door opened. He blinked as he stepped out. He shivered as his body readjusted to the temperature.

“Took you long enough!” 

The sudden noise made him stop. “Sorry?” Shiro turned.

“I almost thought you were going to miss Hunk’s dinner,” Lance walked a few steps to close the space between the two of them. 

“Me? I would never,” Shiro defended with a smile.

Lance frowned, “You didn’t skimp on healing, right?”

“Nope, I stayed the whole time,” he confirmed crossing his heart at the same time.

Lance inspected him up and down before nodding. He took one more step towards Shiro and threw one arm over his shoulder and the other around his side.

Shiro froze not wanting to ruin the moment. He started, “Lance-“

“Thank you. Thank you for saving my life today.” 

Shiro’s heart swelled and his throat closed with emotion. He completed the hug by wrapping his arms around Lance. The younger guy was warm and Shiro yearned to share in that warmth that felt like the sun on a clear day. He slouched just a bit to rest his chin on Lance’s shoulder. 

“Hunk told me everything.”

“ _Everything…_ ” Shiro mentally cringed but he didn’t dare move a muscle. “I’m sorry-“

“Don’t you dare apologize,” Lance placed his hand on Shiro’s shoulders to push him back.

Now face to face, Shiro could feel his cheeks heating with embarrassment. “I was just going to say that I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

“Oh, well that’s ok,” Lance released Shiro.

“No, it’s not.”

“Huh?”

“It’s not ok that you had to go through that.” It was Shiro’s turn to be earnest, “You almost died, if anyone gets how unnerving that is, it’s me.” Shiro moved back to give each of them space.

Lance looked apprehensive as he asked, “You almost died before?”

“During my…” what would the word be, _enslavement, captivity, incarceration_? Shiro settled on, “time with the Galra before Voltron.”

“You don’t ever talk about that time, what happened?” Lance asked.

Shiro knew that on the one hand the curiosity must be killing the whole team to learn what happened but on the other hand, that time had been full of so many horrors that not telling anyone seemed the only way to protect the last remaining bit of the team’s innocence. They had come out to space as kids; ignorant and naive. They weren’t ready to hear his story then. Now that he thought about it, they had been out in space for a while. They turned into adults while waging war and witnessing their own tragedies. Maybe Shiro didn’t have to protect them any longer.

“Shiro?” Lance prodded when he hadn’t answered.

“Sorry, a lot happened, including but not limited to almost dying. It’s a story for another day, though, we’re going to miss dinner if we stay here,” It was an obvious deflection, old habits die hard, but it really was too heavy a topic for a pre-meal conversation.

Lance huffed out a sigh as if he expected as much and smiled, “You’re right.” He closed his eyes as he walked past but Shiro did not miss Lance peek at him as he passed next to him. “Did you know that Pidge figured out a way to actually charge the lions?”

“Really? That’s great!” Shiro started following Lance.

“If you didn’t spend so long in the pod,” Lance trailed off, “I’m sure Pidge will be excited to have new ears to tell. It’s only been like an hour since they figured it out but I must have been told four different times. They must think I’m dumb.”

“I’m sure they don’t. You know how they get with tech,” Shiro laughed. “It’s one of the unchanging things of the universe.” Although he was smart, Shiro didn’t count himself in the same class as Pidge, Hunk or Coran. They had a deeper understanding of how things worked while he himself had more of a superficial working knowledge. Shiro had recognized the same in Lance although he admitted Lance was sometimes quicker at picking up new knowledge. 

“I guess that’s true,” Lance had agreed outwardly but his tone didn’t convey the same sentiment.

“I’m sure that Pidge is jealous of how quick you are to pick up new information,” Shiro complimented.

“W-what? No way, that’s not me,” Lance waved his dismissal.

“Oh? Then maybe I have you confused with the other Lance?” Shiro took a step and began leading. He did it mostly to hide his smile while teasing Lance. “Maybe it was someone else that was able to fly the Blue Lion with no practice? Or maybe it wasn’t you who unlocked a new form of their bayard.”

“Ha ha, ok, I get it, Shiro,” Lance conceded to appease Shiro, “But I’m not anything like Hunk or Pidge. Those things you mentioned were all instincts, I couldn’t explain them even if I tried.”

“No, maybe not, but you’re exceptional in your own way,” Shiro stopped and turned, “Don’t discredit yourself.” He gestured to the door to the dining room. The others had already gathered but hadn’t started eating yet. “After you.”

“Thanks.” Lance entered to a chorus of cheers and applause. He stopped dead in his tracks. After a moment of recovery, Lance scratched the back of his neck and blushed humbly.

Shiro thought it cute how Lance got bashful under the affection of his friends when he usually was so boisterous in his escapades for attention. Shiro stayed in the doorway to appreciate his make-shift, found family in their moment of happiness.


End file.
